Dude–don’t worry! When it comes to your privacy, we’re totally into it!

That’s why we’re taking you aside here–privately, of course–to let you know about our public policy on privacy.

We at Beatnik Turtle (a.k.a. BeatnikTurtle.com) believe everyone has the right to be private. That’s why we can proudly say: we’re into your privacy! But, like, you know, in a good way. Think of us as watching your privacy for you, so you don’t have to. That’s just how much we care.

And that’s why we’re publicly going on the record by stating we’re committed to the following privacy statement.

TL;DR: We’re just a webcomic, but big believers in privacy rights. So, while we may ask for your email or other personally-identifiable info for your membership (if applicable) or Beatnik Turtle merch you buy at The ’93 Store, we keep this completely private and don’t sell or transfer it to any third parties. The only other thing we do is track web stats, but that’s in the aggregate and non-personally-identifiable.

1. GUARANTEE

Since we partner with our sister comic site, 93Comic.com, we here at BeatnikTurtle.com and 93Comic.com guarantee that if you access sign up as a 93 Member, buy Beatnik Turtle merch at the 93 Store, subscribe to the 93 Weekly, or call the 93 Comment Line we promise not to sell, transfer, spam, fondle, or do anything else with your info, email, or voicemail to any third parties. That’s right–even if you beg us to. We ain’t doing it. Hell, we barely have friends, much less have the time to cozy up with third parties. C’mon, we make comic strips and music, after all.

2. ANALYTICS

Of course, there’s website analytics tools and stuff being used, but that’s not personally-identifiable information. It’s aggregated info which can’t be tied back to you. It’s just these tools collect data automatically, including things like cookies (such as device information or IP address), so we want you aware.

3. USER SUBMISSIONS

If you submit anything to us, such as a voicemail on the 93 Comment Line, you gotta consent to let us post or write about that! C’mon some of your voicemails are too funny and meant to be shared. Again, rest assured, anything you submit or do here at 93Comic stays with 93Comic.

Now go ahead, become a 93 Member, buy Beatnik Turtle merch at the 93 Store, subscribe to the 93 Weekly so you don’t miss a single Beatnik Turtle comic, or call the 93 Comment Line with the utmost confidence! C’mon, no one’s watching, we promise, cuz we’ve been looking and we don’t see anyone watching you right now.